Advent and Waiting

*This will be posted later this month on my church's blog as part of their daily advent devotionals. I just really wanted to post it on my blog too. :)

Growing up, I always knew about Advent. My family had an Advent wreath that we would light each Sunday evening, and on Christmas day. As kids, my little brother and I were never allowed to open presents until my father read the Christmas story out of Luke. The older I got, the more annoyed and impatient I got with this tradition. I had not yet grasped the concept that Advent was actually a season of waiting – waiting for the coming of Christ.

You would think that waiting would get easier with age, but it doesn’t. I think we just get better at feigning patience. This is probably the first Christmas season where I have truly found myself in an attitude more appropriate for Advent. No early Christmas shopping. Halfway through December, I haven’t baked any Christmas cookies yet. Instead of exciting plans or ‘Christmas spirit’, I am much more focused on waiting for God. Waiting for Him to show up in my life, waiting for Him to provide, and waiting for His direction.

I would like to say that this attitude has come out of my intense devotion to Christ, but that is so far from true it’s not even funny. I feel like this past year has been particularly trying for me, and I have reached a point where I’m just waiting. It might be more of an “I give up! Whatever, God. Just do Your thing” than it is patiently waiting. But as the psalmist writes in Psalm 119, “It was good for me to be afflicted, that I might learn Your decrees.”

In this season of Advent, I am clinging to the hope, love, peace and joy that Christ promises. “Remember Your word to Your servant, for You have given me hope. My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life.” Psalm 119:49-50 I can honestly say that the Christmas songs on the radio and the decorations everywhere are just not doing it for me this year. I much prefer the declaration that “Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come.” Rev. 4:8 Let us repeat this declaration, day and night, as we wait for the Lord and His promises. 

Blessings in Storms

It's been quite a while since I have posted anything - it has been very busy in our household! It has been a few weeks since Thanksgiving, but I am trying to maintain a grateful heart throughout this consumer-driven holiday season. The best way for me to do this is to reflect on the many blessings that God has bestowed upon us. Most of our blessings have come as provisions directly related to obstacles or trying times, hence my "blessings in storms" post. I wanted to share these stories of God's provision as a way to give glory to Him, and to let you know that when you're having a rough time, you're not alone!

I saw this on Pinterest, and I honestly burst out laughing! There is just something special about seeing things like this that I resonate with, that clearly other people resonate with as well. It helps me to know that I'm not the only one. I have used this quote in three conversations this week already. And it's Monday. This is my life, and I choose to laugh about it rather than cry. :)

Storm: Chris got injured and required major knee surgery, the weekend before I had finals.

Blessings: 1) Somehow I was able to operate on little to no sleep for the week, although this did require a few 3am breakdowns. 2) Chris happened to get injured while at Young Life club, so Young Life had a secondary insurance to cover what our high deductible insurance did not. Praise Jesus! 3) God gifted me with a good friend and neighbor who was an athletic training major, and who graciously did physical therapy exercises with my husband so that our marriage could remain intact. Husband + wife + physical therapy = bad news!

Storms: 1) In order to get a good deal on an apartment, we had to move right in the middle of Chris' frantic efforts to get high school students to Young Life Camp. 2) Also, his car broke down on the way to the new apartment with the moving truck, leaving us with one car for over a week.

Blessings: 1) I was currently class-less and jobless, so I could take a break from my internship to do all the packing and unpacking myself. 2) Since I was stuck at our apartment without a car for about a week, our apartment got completely unpacked and settled! People marveled at how fast everything came together, but they just don't know that it was only because I was stuck in it. :)

Storm: My scholarships ran out, and we had to pay $1,900 out of pocket for my fall semester of graduate school.

Blessings: 1) I had lots of scholarships up until this point. 2) We had the $1,900, even though it wiped out most of our savings.

Storms: 1) My car unexpectedly died (as in, it would take several thousand dollars to fix - a.k.a. dead for all intents and purposes). 2) Chris' car needed major repairs (again) and couldn't pass inspection - at the same time. Needless to say, there was a lot of "Really, God?" going on. 3) Due to the tuition costs mentioned above, we had almost no car fund. 4) I got a ticket for driving Chris' car when the registration was expired.

Blessings: 1) Friends with connections to amazing people who will sell us their car at a very discounted rate - as well as give us a free lunch when we come get the car. 2) Generous family members who will help us front the money for the car. 3) Although we are now officially broke, we had the money we needed to pay for the ticket, title transfer, etc. 4) Generous friends who let us use their family condo when we had to drive to the Outer Banks to get the car. We were able to make a special trip out of it for our 3rd anniversary!

Sometimes I struggle with wanting more - more money, more things, more down time. But then I have to remember how Jesus taught us to pray - "Give us today our daily bread". We only ask for what we need for today - because that is truly all that we need. While there have been tears and frustrations and some lying prostrate on the floor in prayer, I can honestly say that I have never been lacking. God has always given us exactly what we need, and I am truly grateful. No more savings account just means that we rely fully and completely upon the graciousness of Him who gives us all things.